Lucid Nightmares

I know not/all the poems in the world/I used to think (like a child)/all it had to have was rhyme/you just string beautiful words (together) like a trinket/and it would shine on its own/ (later) I noticed/(but) others mix it up/the absence of rhythm/(yet it) has its own pulse/weird/(yet I learned)/(it) is in diversity/(that/and) man finds pleasure (in it)/this poem (may seem tripe to some) is an example/(but I tried my best)/it is in the reader to perceive and understand the thought (yet it is almost a million in one chance)/that he sees <<<<<<<<<<//////////+++++++++++””””””””””##########@@@@@@@@@@!!!!!!!!!!*********^^^^^^^^^^((((((((((the true design))))))))))^^^^^^^^^^**********!!!!!!!!!!@@@@@@@@@@##########””””””””””++++++++++//////////>>>>>>>>>>

Thanks to my English 1 class…I am overstaying in the campus. Take note, it is not even my major!!! Just a GE! Yet this professor of mine expects us to submit 2 essays…which he must revise and return to us…the problem is…he’s nowhere to be found. Always late, always gone, always losing our papers. Even if he’s my favorite prof this sem, I don’t think I can take this anymore…too much torture. As Kim, my korean classmate says, STRESS! Well, this morning I waited 2 n a half hours for him yet he did not come. I came back and am still waitng. i don’t knw if he still plans to check on his office…but my God! He forgets a lot of things, doesn’t he? Like the fact that his students are waiting for their papers…

But then I still like him…(sigh) as the song Jesus of Suburbia goes…"the light of masochists"

PS

still waiting…………………………………………………………………………………………….

Untitled

Percussions drummed in my ears. I switched the player to the next song as I lay on the cool sun seat under the shade of a tree. Outside my small world, the sun bled unto the sand. I sat up, wore my new pink hat and listened to the pulse of the sea amidst Billie Joe’s punk vocals. I heard the waves plunge into the outlying reefs, cascading into the nearby cliffs. To and fro they went until the waves grew bigger. I was waiting for the tide to rise.

            Early that morning, I went swimming in a small lagoon in the middle of the reefs. I dived into the cool water. I felt real good until I saw urchins coming out of their holes. Cute. But not cute enough to swim with. I left.

            I heard voices from the house. My cousins were playing by the pool. They do not like the sea. I don’t blame them – it’s full of tiny critters. Man fears the unknown and the sea has a great deal of it. Yet it still feels great to lie under the sun and feel the waves crashing unto you… But not now. It’s too hot.

            Hours passed. I didn’t know rock music could blend well with the rhythm of the sea. The waves were in time with the bass…and so was the lead guitar.

            “Stranded, all beside myself…” Solitude at last. I put my earphones down and trudged into the shore. My feet were bruised by corals and my hat flew away. Still, I plunged deep into the sea. My skin tingled in the cold water. Cold like my insides. I couldn’t open my eyes. It was dark. I could hear the voices deep within the vast ocean. I smiled.

There are times when I admit, hey high school wasn’t that bad…I kind of miss the laid-back scenario..you know…to not study and still ace an exam..to cram a homework and supply the whole class with answers…

College…although how much freedom I get…is just a completely different world. I’m going to Teresa’s graduation (a friend who is a batch lower) and I feel so sad that I didn’t even cry in my own graduation. It was so insincere…no formal goodbye…I guess our grad sucked…walang drama eh… Yet who am I to blame…no one likes drama anymore. Time to move on.

I dreamt of high school life this morning…it was an extension of my college life…there was this feeling of guilt. I don’t  know. All I know is that in times of weakness, I admit that I really do miss it.

When I told my english prof that i will be writing him an essay based on Rousseau’s philosophy, he said, "are you sure?" Well now I hate him. But of course it will pass. IYou can never hate the guy. He said that it might be a wrong choice and it might "bite me in the ass". What a nice phrase to use…

Sigh…sorry for the angst. I can’t write anything coz I need to spare my energy for writing 1 investigative report and an essay about rabbits. Yup…link Rousseau and rabbits and see what you’ll get…

What’s happening in my life now? Utter chaos and a drive to organize my mind. Well for the past week I’ve been working on a research paper with my classmates in Journ100. Its supposed to be an investigative report…and since we don’t know how to write an investigative report…we are in a blank stage.

But we were able to accomplish a lot of things. We were able to interview 3 people (1 in QC 2 in Cavite) and now we are gathering information and formulating our conclusion…haha but the body is still missing…Oh well…we can do it.

BTW, our report is about a case study on what people go through to make life better for themselves and the effects of "mindless entertainment". The central figure is wowowee. My prof suggested it. Actually that or globalization. We chose the easier one. But still, it is hard work. We’ve been running around a lot of places. If we’re lucky we’ll get to interview someone from abs…

That’s all for now..I have to go back to work.

Ciao!

Boiling Water

Shadows of the ventilating fan ran across the vendor’s face. The lighting was bad inside the cafeteria. I waited for my order. She smiled and I smiled back. I was wearing my tie dye top and loose denims. She had flawless white skin (I wished mine was the same). Her lips were lined with a nice pink shade of lipstick. her eyes were accentuated with mascara. her nose was pointed at the right angle. Some people are lucky. She had all the right curves in the right places unlike me. I’m too thin, the modeling agency said. Sigh. Worse…she used to be a guy.

Why aren’t there any comments in this blog? My friends have you grown tired of me? *sigh*

Well I have grown tired of myself anyway….

If you want to watch the video of green day, basketcase..check my profile..its been there rotting away…

Blah blah…I’ll find something good to post…